Landing

Packing for Chicago felt different than packing for other small trips I’ve taken in the past few years. No hiking clothes or hiking shoes, no toilet paper, no camera, no guidebook, no grubby backpack. For a while, this was essentially all I packed for trips and traveling. For this trip, I’m flying so no worry of bumpy, long bus rides. I’m staying in a nice hotel and then a friend’s house and I’m in the U.S., so no need for toilet paper. I’m going to either the burbs or the city of Chicago so no need for hiking shoes or my fake North Face hiking pants. Since moving to Juneau, I’ve been armed with an iPhone, so no need for an additional camera. And since I’ve packed light, no need for the grubby (although reliable) backpack that Scott has carried bloody deer meat in.

As the plane left Juneau, I looked out the window as long as I could, tracing the various housing divisions leading from the airport and contemplating the smaller still snow covered peaks before the low lying clouds obscured my view and then completely covered the small rounded window of seat 9F. Juneau to Seattle to Chicago. From rainy to windy.

The past couple of weeks have been maddeningly busy and transforming. For a short while there it seemed like I was settling into my Naturalist job with my daily window washing sessions with Miguel, vacuuming, and tying up the boat with Ed. Not to mention my never ending conversations with friendly tourists, repetitive narratives over the PA, and never disappointing viewings of humpbacks and orcas. The whale watching was at times even spectacular with bubble net feeding and consecutive breaches. It was impossible for me to fully dislike a job that allowed me that, but I wasn’t a hundred percent content.

So when the news director at KTOO – Juneau’s public radio station – asked me a couple weeks ago if I could fill in while a reporter was on leave taking care of his mother, I was really disappointed that I already had a more than full-time job. (As a naturalist, I was sometimes working 12-13 hour days). But I did have a Friday off so I went into KTOO for the day and started working on a story. That particular Friday was the only full day I could give KTOO; otherwise I was just going in for an hour or two before I had to be at my naturalist job. After finding out that the reporter who was taking care of his mother would be gone for an indefinite amount of time, I got a call from the news director offering me a full-time summer job working in the newsroom.

Since arriving in Juneau, this is all I’ve wanted to do, but on the day I was offered the position, I struggled with my decision. I hated the thoughts of quitting but I also hated the thought of continuing to be a naturalist. After talking with Scott that night, the decision was made, and I looked in my employee handbook to see what the proper way to resign was. I couldn’t talk with my supervisor right away so I sat with my choice for more than a day feeling terrible. I had made up my mind but being in limbo was mentally exhausting. Last Wednesday I was finally able to tell my supervisor who was more than understanding and my last day as a naturalist was set for Friday. My career as a naturalist began and ended in less than 30 days. And that is okay with me.

My first official day as a reporter at KTOO was on Tuesday. In three days, I’ve written four stories. I’ve been too busy to do any newscasts yet, but that will come. Even though the days have been sunny and warm and I’ve been stuck in front of a computer or on the phone interviewing someone, I haven’t for one second regretted my decision. Slowly but surely I’m remembering what it means to be a reporter, and I know I have a long ways to go before I feel adept at all things Juneau. While I’ve been a public radio reporter before, this is a whole different experience – larger office, communal work space, an editor! I hope to be able to slowly melt back into being a reporter, refocus my lens, and ask the right questions.

For right this moment though, I need to just sit back, recline my seat, and breathe. The plane will soon descend into Seattle where I’m spending the night in the airport. Now that sounds more like my travel style.